Thursday, October 17, 2013

Why I love Football

So I am sitting here watching football and they keep running the "Why I Love Football" commercials and it made me think about why I love football.

See, I used to loathe football. I hated it with a passion. I hated it because my Mother loved it. She watched all the games and she yelled, screamed, and I think even threw things. She was passionate about the game. She loved College and NFL football, she knew all the players. She would follow her favorite college players NFL careers with glee. She hated Notre Dame because back in the stone age they "cheated" LSU out of a bowl game. One of her prized possessions was a Les Miles signed LSU football. She was a FAN.

I hated all that yelling, all that passion. My Dad used to joke that he had to go stand in the front yard during games so the neighbors would know he wasn't beating her, she was THAT loud. I would always find something else to do far far away. It was like that for years.

Then I met Mojo. He loves football, but he loves me more. I'm pretty sure that he did not watch more than two or three games the first year we were together. That, my friends, is love! Then I felt bad and he would watch the games and I would read a book. Then somewhere along the way I started watching, and enjoying the games. I would talk them over with my Mom the next day. We would watch them together and yell at the TV together, both loud, both passionate, I think I may have even thrown something.

My Mom and I were pretty tight. She was one of my best friends. She loved Mojo too, and I overheard her once telling him thank you for getting me to love football!

Then she got sick.

Football was the only thing that calmed her and soothed her so she could sleep during the last weeks of her life. She wasn't awake and aware very often and didn't know who I was or where she was most of the time when she was. She would get agitated because of this and watching reruns of football games on the NFL channel calmed her down, made her feel safe and happy. If she got restless in her sleep all I had to do was put on football and she soothed right back down into peaceful sleep. And believe me, with the amount of pain she was in peaceful sleep was a huge blessing.

So why do I love football?
I love football because it is a connection to my Mother, who I still miss every single day of my life. I love football because I can feel her watching with me. I love football because the last crop of college players she loved are just now starting in the NFL and I can follow them for her (Honey Badger, I'm looking at you). When we watch as a family I can feel her happiness in the room all around us. I love football because Mojo and I are passing the love of football on to our three girls and I KNOW that makes my mom happy.

Monday, August 26, 2013

School Morning Blues

Why is it that by the time I get all three girls on the bus in the morning I feel like I have gone three rounds with Mike Tyson? This just can not be right! It is less than two hours from when they wake up to when the last one gets on the bus and I am exhausted and ready for a nap.

Here is a typical morning at my house...

6:00 a.m. - Alarm goes off, jump out of bed and shut it off before it wakes Mojo. Glance back at bed, sigh, climb back in.

6:10 Jump out of bed in a panic, grab robe try to shut the door silently so it doesn't  make the slightest tiny noise and wake up Mojo. (Which is totally wishful thinking as my leap out of bed has usually jounced him awake anyway) Head to kitchen, start breakfast.

6:20 -6:30 Let the big girls know what time it is / that breakfast is ready. Get snarled at in response.

6:30 Wake up Littlesest as gently as I can if she is not already awake. Let her know breakfast is ready.

6:40 Remind Twinkies that breakfast is getting cold, get snarled at in response.

6:45ish Make sure everyone has everything they need for breakfast, run to room to get "dressed" for the bus stop. Get snarled at on the way.
Open door as quietly as humanly possible, creep around room and bathroom trying not to make the slightest sound (this is not even remotely possible for me, and if you know me at all you are laughing right now). Slap on some clothes and shove my hair in a ponytail, run a toothbrush over my teeth because this year we share the bus stop.

6:50 leave room again trying to shut door as silently as possible because the slightest click is heard as a BANG apparently.

6:51 check if Twinkies are ready to leave for bus (we leave EVERY DAY at 6:55, EVERY DAY this is a total shock!) Get snarled at while girls fly around gathering things, putting on socks and shoes, shoving things in my face to sign and telling me they need a 12 ounce can of soda for class today!

6:55 - 56 Somehow we manage to leave on time for bus. I am still not sure how that happens. Walk the block to the bus stop, get ignored by children but don't really care. Make chit-chat with the other mothers getting ignored by their children.

At some point the bus shows up and both girls come over for a hug and kiss before getting on the bus. This completely makes up for all the snarling! And the ignoring!  Because they don't care who sees them hugging their mom! Yea me! I head back for the hardest part of the day.

7:05 Turn off TV. Herd littlest to her room to get dressed. We have 30 minutes to put on a uniform, socks, shoes, get backpack and snack and if we made it the night before , lunch. Lots of time. Piece of cake because we have picked out the uniform we want to wear the night before.

7:15 Have tried on every pair of underwear in the drawer, none of which "feel right" Littlest is in tears because the only pair she wants to wear are the ones she wore yesterday and they are still in the laundry and "why didn't you wash them after I went to bed last night Mommy?"

7:20 Have settled on undies after being threatened with "I am going to get your Father!" Now crying because the shorts that go under the uniform jumper she picked out and tried on yesterday "don't feel right!"  "okay lets try another pair" "but I want to wear REEEEEDDDDD ones" "those are the only red ones we have." "They don't feel right!" " okay you don't have to wear those, lets try a different pair." " I want to wear RED ones!" "Those are the only red ones we have." "They don't feel right!" Wash, rinse, repeat....

7:30 Tears, mine, hers...

7:35 "You are going to miss the bus if you don't put on your socks and shoes RIGHT NOW!!!!" "But they have a bump!" "You have tried on every sock in the drawer, put some on NOW!!!!!"

7:40 "Wait! I forgot my snack!" SIGH "Well go grab something out of the snack bin" "I don't know what I want? what can I have?" "Any thing in the snack bin" "I don't want any of that, what can I have?" "Anything in the snack bin." "I don't want any if that, what can I have?"... Wash, Rinse, Repeat (Admittedly, this is my own fault because I forgot to have her pick it out the night before)

7:45 Exit the house in tears, hers, mine.

Waiting for the bus...

"Mom I need a tissue."
"Okay what pocket are they in?"
"I don't have any."
"I gave you a travel pack to keep in your bag last week."
"I took them out"
"Well if we go back in to get a tissue we might miss the bus, you will have to wait."
"I need a tissue."
"I don't have one."
"But, I need a tissue."
"Do you want to miss the bus?"
"Okay then."
"But, I need a tissue."
"I don't have one"
"But I need a tissue!"
"Honey, I don't have a tissue, maybe the bus driver will have one."
"But I need a tissue."
Wash, Rinse, Repeat until the bus finally, after about thirty years, arrives.

Collapse on lawn.

Monday, April 8, 2013

Adventures in Grocery Shopping

So today I had to change all my plans of watching tacky reality TV while I washed and folded the mountains of laundry my thoughtless family made over the weekend. Instead I had to do the weekly shop, as tomorrow is Mojo's birthday and he changed his mind about having a "cake". I would so put that word in air quotes if I could! He wants a BRAN "CAKE"!!!! A bran cake???? ugh. How in the world could I be married to someone who wants a bran cake for his birthday? That is just sauteed in wrong sauce.

Anyhoo, I thought that since I had to go to the store and get the wheat germ and other "yummy" ingredients for the "cake" I would just go ahead get the weekly shop over with.

What is up with you folks at the grocery store. Why do you feel the need to totally stick your whole head in my buggy to better see what I have put in it Nosey McNoesy-pants???

 I mean really, this happened more than once. So the third time, I "accidentally" ran into the offending party. She was so busy sticking her head in my buggy that she forgot to turn her buggy. I don't know, maybe it was the wheat germ? Or the golden raisins? Whatever, mind your own business! I think I might just start putting weird random stuff in my buggy. Like, layer the whole bottom with mouse traps, or five huge bottles of vodka and a tarp.

Also what is up with the grumpy old men? Every one of them was grocery shopping today and they all had to get in my way and grump at me.

On a side note, I do frequently have"accidental" collisions at the grocery. What?!?! If you don't want to get run over, don't leave your buggy in the middle of the aisle where I can't get around it! and especially don't leave your stinkin' buggy blocking the aisle and then LEAVE the aisle. You will come back and there will be something missing from your cart, and it will be moved. You have been warned!

Oh and sorry for all the "". It has just been that kind of day.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Poor Sick Babies

Last week Middlest woke up with a fever and a sore throat. She missed three days of school and the fever and sore throat went away and left behind a horrible croupy cough. She sounded like a barking seal y'all! Nothing touched that cough, not Vicks vapo rub, not cough drops, not any kind of cough syrup, not even Dearie's tried and true honey and whiskey remedy (that hot mess ALWAYS works!). Sigh.

I took her to the Doc on Monday and begged him to fix her.  He said that is was going around and wrote her a bunch of prescriptions: antibiotic, light steroid, codeine cough syrup, and breathing treatment meds, BUT he said she could go back to school. . Then just as the appointment was wrapping up he said "I bet another pretty young lady is going to feeling poorly pretty soon too." "WHAAAATTTTT" And sure enough, Oldest came home from school with a sore throat and fever. Bigger sigh. I got her on the antibiotic PDQ, hoping to avoid the barking seal cough, and she has been home from school ever since.  She is cuddled up on the chesterfield watching a documentary on the Galapagos Islands and playing with her iPad as I type this.

It is no fun for them to be sick though. They don't like to stay home without the other, and they really hate going to school alone. (In case I haven't said it before, kids are weird and twins are weirder!) But is no fun for me either. I have to keep all this medicine straight. Which isn't made any easier by instructions like " give three pills twice a day for the first two days and then two pills twice a day for three days, and then spin around four times and hop on one foot.".

I am praying the Littlest will stay healthy and that Oldest can go back to school tomorrow.
Oh, and y'all... that MucinexDM is the bombdiggity! But only take it in the morning cause you can't take it with the liquid blue heaven in a bottle at night.